This Monkey Dong review was last updated in February 2020.
So what is it exactly? The Monkey Dong by Serious Monkey Bizzness is a strap on urination device that dispenses fake pee, which looks and acts just like the real thing. Not only do you get clean urine, but also a life-like prosthetic penis that matches your skin color. That way, the person watching over you will never suspect a thing.
Based on my research, this is one of the more reputable kits on the market, with many positive reviews online of people passing their drug tests with ease.
What Can You Use The Monkey Dong For?
Personally, I don’t judge what you decide to do outside of the workplace, as long as you’re not hurting other people. But unfortunately, I don’t make the rules.
And it just so happens that more and more companies are enforcing mandatory drug tests. With it even being required in some situations. 
Since bringing in someone else’s urine sample is not a recommended option, the folks at Serious Monkey Bizzness were creative enough to make a skin tone urination device.
I read one review after another, and they all said the same thing - the Monkey Dong had been a life-saver. Using the Monkey Dong could be a great decision if you’re looking for a set of products to keep your current lifestyle and still be able to pass a drug test.
If you’re worried that it won’t work for you or you’ll get caught because it’s hard to use, just hear me out. Let me explain how easy it is to pass a screening using this prosthetic penis. It’s so simple you only need one hand.
Here’s How To Use Monkey Dong to Pass a Test
Using Monkey Dong is no sweat! A request for a screening can put you in a nerve-racking position if you’re worried you’ll fail, so shoot for the stress-free solution that’s guaranteed to work every time.
Here’s a step-by-step guide on how to use the Monkey Dong for your drug test:
- Release the exterior safety valve of the bladder where the fake pee goes
- Draw the urine into the syringe (included in the package)
- Squeeze the tip of the dong and insert the syringe into the pee hole
- Inject the contents into the bladder
- Close the safety valve to keep all the pee inside
- An hour before your test, unfasten the velcro of your elastic belt and apply one of the heating pads to it
- Strap on the belt with the temperature strip touching your skin
- When the temperature strip reaches 96-100 degrees, you’re ready to give your sample
- Open the safety valve, squeeze the tip of the Dong, and release the pee into the cup
All you need to do is make sure you have your urine at the right temperature when it’s time to hand over the sample.
That way, when the piss is checked, it will look like your body made it!
Now we’ve covered the urinating part, but what if instead of giving the sample alone in a bathroom, you need to do it in front of someone at the facility?
Does It Come in Different Skin Colors?
You can bet your sweet ass it does! The Dong comes in six natural looking different colors, to make sure no one suspects what you’re up to, even if you’re “exposed”.
You can find it available in a color that matches your skin tone. Choose from light white, white, tan, Latino, brown or black.But let’s not forget there are other fake piss dispensers available too.
Which ones are the best and guaranteed to work every time? Check out how Monkey Dong compares to the Whizzinator for passing a drug test.
Monkey Dong VS Whizzinator: Which Fake Piss Dispenser Is Better?
I’ve heard about people who used the Whizzinator before, and it’s different from my experience with Monkey Dong. From what I’ve gathered, Monkey Dong works better for three main reasons: price, silent valve, and customer service. As you can see from a closed Facebook group below one customer tried both for his drug test and the Monkey Dong came out on top.
The Monkey Dong has the edge over the competition in that it is way cheaper. It costs 35% less than the Whizzinator!
Now, let’s be honest here: if you’re looking for a product to help you pass a pre-employment drug screen, you are probably out of a job at the moment. So it makes sense to save money when you can still get a great solution to your problem.
Plus, why pay more for a product that doesn’t even work as well?
The Whizzinator’s valve is less than perfect. It sounds more like a door opening than a switch being turned. That alone can get you in trouble if you’re being watched while giving your sample.
On the other hand, Monkey Dong’s valve is as silent as it gets. Even if there’s someone in the room with you, you can quickly open the valve without being heard.
Monkey Dong’s customer service is fantastic! I had a bunch of questions on my first go-around and called them. I got answers fast and full explanations. It really put my mind at ease.
They offer both a toll-free line (in America) and a number where you can reach their customer support from abroad. Canadians, you’re welcome!
Considering the factors above, it’s not hard to decide which product offers the best value for purchase. Are you ready to get yours?
Our #1 Choice?
The Monkey Dong
The Monkey Dong kit is available at a bargain in comparison to the competition. If you’re not satisfied with your purchase, you can get a full refund for up to 30 days after the purchase date.
It’s really a no-brainer!
Make sure you buy it online directly from the manufacturer. The product is available in 157 locations in the US and Canada, but buying from the manufacturer is the only way to be certain you’re getting the real deal. There are some local stores that sell it but they are hard to find and unreliable at times. Yes, we've talked to people that have gotten a fake product or a broken one from buying at a local smoke shop.
The lifespan of the product is good for up to one year from your purchase so the stuff does expire. Buying direct means, you won’t get stuff that’s no longer good.
With your substance screening fast approaching, you have several options right now:
- Try to detox on your own (good luck)
- Come up with your own pee sample and hope it’s up to par, or
- Buy this product and be sure you’ll get it right and land the job!
What’s it gonna be?
Get your Monkey Dong today and pass your drug test without stress!
Final Verdict: Monkey Dong WORKS!
Based on my experience, I can comfortably recommend the Monkey Dong urination device. You can be sure you’ll get the best cost and value solution to your problem. Not only does it have quality synthetic pee, but it’s also easy to use and practically guaranteed to work for a drug test!
If you’re still worried about whether this fake piss will pass the test, let me assure you it behaves as urine should - it also looks, smells and foams like urine. You can get a dong that matches your skin color, so you’re covered even if they make you pee with someone else in the room.
Most importantly, don’t waste your money on a cheap knock off or the Whizzinator competitor product. For obvious reasons, you don't want a product that will leak.
I just checked and Monkey dong is actually on sale this month so act fast if you want to take advantage of this deal.