This Monkey Dong review was last updated in October 2024.
A lot of the time, urine analysis drug tests are supervised and monitored. This means that taking in a cup of synthetic urine is not always an option.
That’s where the Monkey Dong comes in.
So what is it exactly? The Monkey Dong, manufactured and marketed by Serious Monkey Bizzness, is a strap-on urination device that dispenses fake urine.
It looks and acts just like the real thing. Not only do you get clean synthetic urine with the right uric acid content, but also a lifelike prosthetic penis that matches your skin color. That way, the person watching over you will never suspect that it’s fake urine.
Based on my research, this is one of the more reputable fake urine kits on the market, with many positive reviews online of people passing their drug tests with ease.
What Can You Use The Monkey Dong For?
The Monkey Dong is used for helping individuals pass urine tests by providing a discreet way to submit synthetic urine samples.
It just so happens that more and more companies are enforcing mandatory drug tests. [1]
Since bringing in someone else’s real urine samples is not a recommended option if the test is monitored, the folks at Serious Monkey Bizzness were creative enough to make a urination device to match various skin tones.
I read one review after another, and they all said the same thing – the Monkey Dong had been a lifesaver in urine tests. Using the Monkey Dong urination device could be a great decision if you’re looking for a set of fake pee products to maintain your current lifestyle and still be able to pass a urine test.
If you’re worried that it won’t work for you, or you’ll get caught because it’s hard to use, let me explain how easy it is to pass a screening using this prosthetic penis. It’s so simple; you only need one hand to use it.
Here’s How To Use Monkey Dong Urinating Device to Pass a Urine Drug Test
Using Monkey Dong is no sweat! A request for a drug screening can put you in a nerve-racking position if you’re worried you’ll fail, so go for the stress-free solution that’s guaranteed to work every time.
Here’s a step-by-step guide on how to use the Monkey Dong fake penis:
Release the exterior safety valve of the bladder where the fake pee goes
Draw the urine into the syringe (included in the package)
Squeeze the tip of the dong and insert the syringe into the pee hole
Inject the contents into the bladder
Close the safety valve to keep all the pee inside
An hour before your test, unfasten the velcro of your elastic belt and apply one of the heating pads to it
Strap on the belt, with the temperature strip touching your skin
When the temperature strip reaches 96-100 degrees, you’re ready to give your sample
Open the safety valve, squeeze the tip of the Dong, and release the pee into the cup
That’s all there is to it!
All you need to do is ensure you have your urine at the right temperature when it’s time to hand over the urine sample. The good news is that the temperature strip is accurate.
That way, when the pee is checked after the test, it will look like your body created it!
Now we’ve covered the urination part, what if you need to give the sample in front of someone at the facility, instead of doing it alone in a bathroom?
Does It Come in Different Skin Colors?
Yes, the Dong urination device does come in different skin colors, offering a choice of six natural tones to match your skin tone for discretion during a drug test.
You can find it available in a color that matches your skin tone. Choose from light white, white, tan, Latino, brown, or black.
But let’s not forget there are other fake piss dispensers available too.
Which ones are the best and guaranteed to work every time? Check out how Monkey Dong compares to the Whizzinator when passing a drug test.
Monkey Dong VS Whizzinator: Which Fake Piss Dispenser Is Better?
Based on the information provided, the Monkey Dong fake urine dispenser appears to be the preferred choice over the Whizzinator due to its lower price, silent internal valve, and excellent customer service.
I’ve gathered that Monkey Dong’s prosthetic penis works better for three main reasons: price, silent internal valve, and customer service.
As you can see from a closed Facebook group below, one customer tried both for his drug test and the Monkey Dong came out on top.
Price
The Monkey Dong fake penis has the edge over the competition because it is cheaper. It costs 35% less than the Whizzinator!
Now, let’s be honest here: if you’re looking for a product to help you pass a pre-employment drug test screening, you probably don’t have a job at the moment. So it makes sense to save money while still getting an effective solution to your problem.
Also, why pay more for a product that doesn’t even work as well?
Silent valve
The Whizzinator’s valve is less than perfect. It sounds more like a door opening than a switch being turned. That alone can get you in trouble if you’re being watched while giving your sample during a drug test.
On the other hand, Monkey Dong’s valve is as silent as it gets. Even if there’s someone in the room with you, you can quickly open the valve without being heard.
Customer service
Monkey Dong’s customer service is fantastic! I had a bunch of questions on my first go-around. When I called them, I got answers fast and full explanations, which put my mind at ease.
The company offers both a toll-free line (in America) and a number where you can reach their customer support from abroad. You’re welcome, Canadians!
Considering the factors above, it’s not hard to decide which fake urine product offers the best value for purchase. Are you ready to get yours?
Monkey Dong beats the Whizzinator 10 times out of 10.
Our #1 Choice?
The Monkey Dong
The Monkey Dong fake penis kit is available at a bargain in comparison to the competition. If you’re not satisfied with your purchase, you can get a full refund for up to 30 days after the purchase date.
It is a no-brainer!
WARNING!
Make sure you buy the Monkey Dong fake urine dispenser online directly from the manufacturer. The fake penis product is available in 157 locations in the US and Canada, but buying from the manufacturer is the only way to be certain you’re getting the real deal.
Some local stores sell the Monkey Whizz kit, but they are difficult to find and can be unreliable at times. We’ve talked to people who have gotten a fake or broken synthetic urine product from a local smoke shop.
The lifespan of the high-quality synthetic urine product is up to one year from your purchase, which means the stuff does expire, losing uric acid and other important components. Buying directly means that you won’t get stuff that’s no longer effective.
With your substance screening fast approaching, you have several options right now:
Try to detox on your own (good luck)
Come up with your synthetic urine sample and hope it’s up to par, or
Buy this fake pee product and be sure you’ll get your drug test right and land the job!
What’s it gonna be?
My advice? Get your Monkey Dong synthetic urine kit today and pass your drug test without stress!
Based on my experience, I can comfortably recommend Serious Monkey Bizzness’s Monkey Dong urination device. You can be sure you’ll get the best cost and value solution to your drug test problem. Not only does it have quality synthetic urine, but it’s also easy to use and practically guaranteed to work for a drug test!
If you’re still worried about whether this fake pee will pass the drug test, let me assure you it behaves as urine should – it also looks, smells, and foams like urine. You can get a dong that matches your skin tone, so you’re covered even if they make you urinate with someone else in the room.
Most importantly, don’t waste your money on a cheap knock-off or the Whizzinator. For obvious reasons, you don’t want a synthetic urine product that will leak.
Let us know about your experience with the Monkey Dong synthetic urine dispenser!
Lisa is a content writer, blogger, and entrepreneur. When she is not managing her business, Colonial Stores, Lisa spends most of her time researching about synthetic urine products to review. She loves sharing her learnings in a form of blogging that’s why she built a website to connect with many people. You can read more about me here.
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